{"id":7213,"date":"2020-12-15T11:43:52","date_gmt":"2020-12-15T16:43:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/?p=7213"},"modified":"2022-12-10T11:57:19","modified_gmt":"2022-12-10T16:57:19","slug":"holiday-self-care-series-day-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/holiday-self-care-series-day-3\/","title":{"rendered":"Holiday Self-Care Series: Day 3"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Hi everyone! My name is <a href=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/about-diana\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Diana Garcia<\/a>, and I\u2019m a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Florida and the owner of a private practice called <a href=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Nurturing Minds Counseling<\/a>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I\u2019ve been doing 12 days of tips as part of my Holiday Self-Care Series! My goal with this series is to help you navigate the holiday season. Because to be honest, as much as I love the holidays, I also know that I feel extra stressed.And after working with clients for years during the holidays, I know I\u2019m not unique in feeling a bit more stressed during the season.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So far in the series, we\u2019ve covered the following:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><a href=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/holiday-self-care-series-day-1\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Holiday Self-Care Series: Day 1<\/a>: Helping you practice a three-minute breathing exercise to boost your mindfulness skills.<\/li><li><a href=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/holiday-self-care-series-day-2\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Holiday Self-Care Series: Day 2<\/a>: Focused on truly understanding and identifying your triggers during the holiday season.<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you haven\u2019t read those yet, you could benefit from checking those out first. Especially since today\u2019s blog will build on naming your triggers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Holiday Self-Care Series: Day 3: Knowing &amp; Naming The Story<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Today I\u2019m going to be talking about knowing the thoughts or, a lot of times, what I like to call the \u2018stories\u2019, that come up concerning the triggers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you prefer to watch the video on this, check out the video here. If not, keep scrolling to continue reading the blog.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Video on Holiday Self-Care Series: Day 3: Knowing &amp; Naming The Story<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Holiday Self-Care Series: Day 3\" width=\"720\" height=\"405\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/w_GqjVgKHaI?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-ugb-spacer ugb-spacer ugb-a7560e8 ugb-spacer--v2 ugb-main-block\"><div class=\"ugb-inner-block\"><div class=\"ugb-block-content\"><div class=\"ugb-spacer--inner\"><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">What do I mean by \u2018stories\u2019? The \u2018story\u2019 is the associated thoughts that show up wen you consider any situation. Thoughts are the stream of conscious including images that are going on in your mind.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">In Day 2 of the Holiday Self-Care Series, I encouraged you to identify your holiday triggers. So I will a hypothetical example to help illustrate what I mean by story.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Let&#8217;s say one of your triggers during the holidays is interactions with family members. Whether that\u2019s all or specific members, or whether that\u2019s just the general tone or vibe in these get togethers. In this case, let\u2019s say family gatherings with extended family are a trigger for you because one or more family members tend to give you unsolicited advice on your appearance, relationship status, career etc. Just the thought of having to explain your career choice one more time gives you hives.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The \u2018story\u2019 is the thought about that specific situation that shows up and feels difficult to manage in. Or the story is really the reason that is causing you distress. And that story can be unique for each person. For example, it could be \u201cGosh! She&#8217;s so critical! She just loves to criticize and put me down. I bet she\u2019s know it makes me cringe\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Perhaps it\u2019s something more along the lines of \u201cShe must think I\u2019m such a failure because of my career choice. And she might be right!\u201d Or maybe it\u2019s, \u201cI don\u2019t really care what she thinks but how do I stop it? Or shut it down? I can\u2019t possibly say something? Can I? My mom will be so embarrassed if I\u2019m rude.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-large is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/thought-catalog-sCKtNbIKOuQ-unsplash-1024x683.jpg\" alt=\"holiday-self-care\" class=\"wp-image-10167\" width=\"768\" height=\"512\" srcset=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/thought-catalog-sCKtNbIKOuQ-unsplash-1024x683.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/thought-catalog-sCKtNbIKOuQ-unsplash-scaled-600x400.jpg 600w, https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/thought-catalog-sCKtNbIKOuQ-unsplash-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/thought-catalog-sCKtNbIKOuQ-unsplash-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/thought-catalog-sCKtNbIKOuQ-unsplash-1536x1024.jpg 1536w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 768px) 100vw, 768px\" \/><figcaption>Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Whatever the story is, you get caught up with the thoughts that come up. But depending on what are the specific story behind the trigger that it\u2019s difficult, can influence the way you ultimately choose to handle it. Because depending on whether you\u2019re more stressed about feeling shamed in that moment and needing to cope or you don\u2019t really feel shame in that moment, more so confused on how to assertively handle it while taking into account your mother\u2019s potential reaction.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I encourage you to list out all your triggers and the associated story like this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>Trigger:&nbsp;<\/li><li>Story:<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Now that you know exactly what are the associated thoughts, you can than figure how to best handle these sticky thoughts. When you realize that you\u2019ve been hooked my certain thoughts, it can be helpful to try to create some distance from these thoughts. These are just thoughts that passing through your mind. And it doesn\u2019t necessarily even matter if the thoughts are factual or not. Who knows if your aunt is trying to be critical, disrepestcul or maybe in her own way, she believes she\u2019s being helpful and supportive? Who knows? She could just be completely clueless of how her responses are landing.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There can be various reasons to explain her behaviors. And you\u2019re goal is to focus more on helping you create some distance from the story so you can then make an intentionally decision on how you want handle the trigger rather than just getting bullied around by your thoughts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">One way to create distance from thoughts is to think of this story as a chapter in a book. If this story is a chapter in a book, what would title it? What would call the chapter in this book?&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Would it be the Annoying Aunt story, would it be the Critical Aunt story, would it be the There She Goes Again story? By acknowledging the story is and naming it (even giving it a funny name), it can help you notice when this particular thought is getting you all caught up and you can start to tell yourself&nbsp; \u201cOh! There&#8217;s that Annoying Aunt story!\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Simply by labeling these thoughts and giving them a name, gives you a huge advantage by creating more room to be able to view these thoughts objectively and reduce some of the impact in the moment.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Next Steps<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">To recap, Day 3 of the Holiday Self-Care Series is about noticing what are you specific thoughts about your holiday triggers. Once you can name the stories, then you\u2019re in a much better position to better cope with the situation rather than getting too hooked by everything your mind is saying about the situation. It\u2019s easy to forget that a thought about a situation isn\u2019t actually the thought itself. It reminds me of the quote:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-stackable-blockquote is-style-default stk-block-blockquote stk-block stk-b4c5569\" data-block-id=\"b4c5569\"><style>.stk-b4c5569{margin-bottom:25px !important}<\/style><div class=\"has-text-align-left stk-block-blockquote__content stk-container stk-b4c5569-container stk-hover-parent\"><div class=\"stk-block-content stk-inner-blocks\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-stackable-icon stk-block-icon stk-block stk-97ab6b5\" data-block-id=\"97ab6b5\"><style>.stk-97ab6b5 .stk--svg-wrapper .stk--inner-svg svg:last-child,.stk-97ab6b5 .stk--svg-wrapper .stk--inner-svg svg:last-child :is(g,path,rect,polygon,ellipse){fill:var(--nv-primary-accent) !important}<\/style><span class=\"stk--svg-wrapper\"><div class=\"stk--inner-svg\"><svg style=\"height:0;width:0\"><defs><linearGradient id=\"linear-gradient-97ab6b5\" x1=\"0\" x2=\"100%\" y1=\"0\" y2=\"0\"><stop offset=\"0%\" style=\"stop-opacity:1;stop-color:var(--linear-gradient-97-ab-6-b-5-color-1)\"><\/stop><stop offset=\"100%\" style=\"stop-opacity:1;stop-color:var(--linear-gradient-97-ab-6-b-5-color-2)\"><\/stop><\/linearGradient><\/defs><\/svg><svg xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" viewBox=\"0 0 50 50\" aria-hidden=\"true\" width=\"32\" height=\"32\"><path d=\"M19.8 9.3C10.5 11.8 4.6 17 2.1 24.8c2.3-3.6 5.6-5.4 9.9-5.4 3.3 0 6 1.1 8.3 3.3 2.2 2.2 3.4 5 3.4 8.3 0 3.2-1.1 5.8-3.3 8-2.2 2.2-5.1 3.2-8.7 3.2-3.7 0-6.5-1.2-8.6-3.5C1 36.3 0 33.1 0 29 0 18.3 6.5 11.2 19.6 7.9l.2 1.4zm26.4 0C36.9 11.9 31 17 28.5 24.8c2.2-3.6 5.5-5.4 9.8-5.4 3.2 0 6 1.1 8.3 3.2 2.3 2.2 3.4 4.9 3.4 8.3 0 3.1-1.1 5.8-3.3 7.9-2.2 2.2-5.1 3.3-8.6 3.3-3.7 0-6.6-1.1-8.6-3.4-2.1-2.3-3.1-5.5-3.1-9.7 0-10.7 6.6-17.8 19.7-21.1l.1 1.4z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div><\/span><\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-stackable-text stk-block-text stk-block stk-b4206c9\" data-block-id=\"b4206c9\"><p class=\"stk-block-text__text\">The thought of a tiger is not a tiger &#8211; Anon<\/p><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Keep that in mind, just because you think of a tiger, doesn\u2019t mean you\u2019re going to get bite by the imaginary tiger in front of you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Alright, guys, I hope the third day in the Holiday Self-Care Series is helpful.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Check out these other resources to take care of yourself during the holiday season:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>This blog on <a href=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/12-days-of-tips-for-the-holidays-day-4\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Holiday Self-Care Series: Day 4<\/a>.<\/li><li>Subscribe to<a href=\"https:\/\/722a68ac.sibforms.com\/serve\/MUIEAP3AAxD6KGFzSDuDEyHUPTHJVq0e9eNu5c8BHmchNrrBJA2nBzZ5i-pgQucxfjSdPzhADJ5CqADvgPwteSt5Q2Zsx_EPszDQrLrmem2sUDtyDMu9uODgPwZvUr6LCxuU9dyk_HOEMylTmsdYwfN4AMvTPPmyKz8QNSru3pJoytfAMGn2WNd8Z3QP2XE79yVxVmzS65NvukxN\" rel=\"nofollow noopener\" target=\"_blank\"> my newsletter<\/a> to get resources to take care of yourself straight to your inbox<\/li><li>This blog on <a href=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/are-you-getting-hooked-or-unhooked\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Are You Getting Hooked or Unhooked<\/a>?&nbsp;<\/li><li>Consider <a href=\"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/individual-therapy\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">individual therapy<\/a> if you need some more support during the holidays.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Lastly, I hope you continue nurturing your mind, body, and soul, whatever that looks like for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hi everyone! My name is Diana Garcia, and I\u2019m a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Florida and the owner of&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":7214,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","nfd_image_url":"","nfd_onboarding_generated":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[156,365],"tags":[203,188,189,366,194,193,199],"class_list":["post-7213","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog-posts","category-holiday-self-care-series","tag-acceptance-and-commitment-therapy","tag-anxiety","tag-anxiety-as-a-symptom","tag-holiday-self-care","tag-holiday-stress","tag-mental-health","tag-stress"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7213","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7213"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7213\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10170,"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7213\/revisions\/10170"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7214"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7213"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7213"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nurturingmindscounseling.com\/newstaging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7213"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}